


Forbidden Fruits

by Jay_with_Splice



Category: Saints Row
Genre: Silly antics, The Boss gets freaked out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 09:00:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4700060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jay_with_Splice/pseuds/Jay_with_Splice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What even are those things in that alien contraption in the kitchen?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forbidden Fruits

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically my own reaction to seeing those little blue alien fruit things.  
> And I needed something to write to get me out of my writer's block.

While the world had been destroyed, and millions lost their lives to the hands of Zinyak, including nearly every member of his crew, the Boss downright refused to let this predicament get him down and break his spirit. Vengeance was on his mind, and the Boss would not stop until Zinyak's head was a fucking hood ornament on the front of his new ship. But, until that happened, he still needed to save the remainder of his crew before they could even think of getting close to the overlord.

And as all good empires began, the Boss first needed to access what they did or did not have. So far, from what he's seen, they had a ship, Kinzie, and Keith. Which was a hell of a lot better than when he first joined up with the Saints. Back then, he had Julius. And everyone now knows that Julius was a piece of shit. But even then, however, it was a whole lot easier to rise to the top of the food chain. He had only just escaped the Simulation, and Kinzie had yet to find a way to put him back inside without Zinyak shutting down the doors on him. As it had seemed, the Boss had yet to get a look around his new base of operations. Which didn't really matter to him. At all...

"So you claimed this little corner?" The Boss asked Kinzie with a crooked grin marring his handsome stubbled face. Kinzie blew a strand of hair out of her face. It was growing exceedingly obvious that the Boss was getting on her nerves. "Complete with a little hippy beanbag chair and some nerd tech. Nice call." Now, the Boss could see the angry twitch in her left brow. "It's a real cute color too! I guess nerdy girls can still like pink-"

"Why don't you have a look around the ship?" Kinzie cut him off with a suggestion, which caused the Boss' playful smile to fade. The Boss did not like to be interrupted. Even if the interuptee was Kinzie Kensington. "You haven't done that yet. Familiarize yourself with each room. I'll call you when the chair is ready to put you into the Simulation." Her eyes lowered back down to her laptop's screen, and that was the end of this conversation. The Boss sniffed, and he stepped back and away from his favorite hacker.

The lower layer of the ship was larger than the top off, so long as he didn't count the halls leading up into the bedrooms near the control room of the ship. So away he went, waltzing up the tiniest set of stairs, and past the little work out area, complete with weights, and a punching bag. There was a large lounge downstairs near the workout area, filled with comfortable chairs, a soft looking couch, what seemed to be a computer with internet(how that was possible was unknown), a pool table, and a large stuffed shark on the wall. The golden chains and pimp hat really made the Boss think of Zimos.

But otherwise, there was nothing at all interesting left in this room. So, the Boss headed into the cargo docks just beneath the stairs. Large crates lined the shelves, filled with canned foods, laser ammo for the alien weapons, and booze. The booze was very important. Off in the corner of the room near the second door lied a couch and an old television set. The Boss was confident there were a lot more things located in this room, but he really didn't feel like searching around. The Boss did have a silent list of people in his mind. He planned accordingly to who he remembered seeing getting taken away in a red beam of light, and with those people, he planned where they would spend most of their time when he rescued them. Along with the bottom floor amusements, the ship included dart boards, bathrooms, bedrooms, an arsenal large enough to supply a small army, and a kitchen.

The kitchen. The Boss had yet to explore the kitchen.He exited the cargo dock through the door nearest to the couch, peering to his left. From where he stood, the Boss could see boxes and boxes of beer. a few crates of water, a large fridge, a multitude of fruits and vegetables and...uh...what the hell is that?! "Kinzie!" He called towards the Hacker's hangout space. He heard her annoyed sigh. His call of her name didn't seem to make her come over, so the Boss tried again. "Kinzie!!" He yelled again, and yet she still didn't respond. "KINZIE!"

"Oh my god! What!?" Kinzie had finally snapped back. The Boss heard her stomping footsteps coming his way and soon enough, the hacker was in the kitchen with him. Her hands rested firmly on her hips and an annoyed frown marred her thin lips. The Boss smiled in response. "What do you need to ask that's soooo important? Because if you haven't noticed, I'm working my ass off trying to get you into Zinyak's Simulation in order for us to save-"

"What are those?" The Boss pointed out the strange blue things propped up in what seemed to be an alien fermentor. Slowly, Kinzie rolled her eyes and approached, staring at the stalks of blue with a mixture of emotions swirling his her gaze. "Agh! They moved! Are they alive? Why are these things on the ship!?" The Boss had scrambled backwards when one of the stalks twitched and bobbed as if it were alive.

"It's a Zin fruit, Boss." Kinzie shook her head with an irritated huff. "It sometimes moves to show when it's still rip. These grow in mass quantities on the original Zin home planet." She flicked it with her finger, giving the Boss a side glance. He was still staring at the plant suspiciously. "Although, I'm still not sure if they're safe for us to eat, so refrain from doing so until I hack further into the Zin systems. This machine should keep them fresh until I figure it out." She made her escape, leaving the Boss standing in the kitchen and staring at the strange little plants as their twitching settled down.

An ugly sneer, and he slowly eased himself out the kitchen. He didn't want to be near those things any longer. Maybe he could go bother his Vice President for a while instead?


End file.
